While in my room yesterday, I
overheard my neighbours discussing about celebrities and their freelance
lifestyle. They talked extensively about their failed marriages and why they
can’t stay married. They talked about Ini Edo and her US-based ex-husband, Philip
Ehiagwina whose marriage crashed within six years.
They said that Funke Akindele
popularly known as Jenifa got married to Kehinde Oloyede Almaroof and their
marriage crashed within one year but that she has remarried on August 2016 to
Abdulrasheed Bello popularly known as JJC Skillz.
Trending further in their
celebrity gossip was Monalisa Chinda who they said suffered a divorce from her
husband Dejo Richards in 2009 after they had a daughter together but remarried
on September 2016 to Victor Tonye Coker in Greece.
Furthermore, they talked about the Ex-beauty queen and top Nollywood
actress Stephanie Linus Okereke who got married to ex-Super Eagles defender
Chikelue Iloenyosi in 2004 but who later remarried in 2012 after the first marriage
crashed in 2007.
Kate Henshaw’s marriage to
Roderick James Nuttal crashed after 12 years according to them, adding that Shan
George was once married to Tony Nwosisi but now a divorcee and a single mother.
I also heard that Clarion Chukwurah Abiola has been married at least twice.
I was not bold enough to
contribute to their conversation or gossip because my opinion is contrary to
their point of view. It is true that divorce case in the celebrity world is
more, compared to others but they talked about it as if it is the problem of
celebrities alone. I overheard them conclude that the wayward life of
celebrities accounts for their inability to stay married.
And I asked myself, is it really about been wayward? Is
it really celebrity thing? There are many cases of crashed marriages; either
reported or not. Many are even enduring in their homes, and dying in silence. Recently, Naij.com reported that a woman was arrested for stabbing her
husband to death after he received a phone call from a woman suspected to be
his lover.
Furthermore, according to The Sun of December 18, a newly-wedded bride in Sokoto named Shafa Muhammad attacked her husband
with a razor blade and injured him on the head just three weeks after their
wedding.
Also trending is the case of
Maryam Sanda, wife of Mr Bilyamin Muhammed Bello who is the son of a former
chairman of the Peoples Democratic Party, PDP, Haliru Bello. It was reported that she allegedly stabbed
her husband to death after she saw a text message on the husband’s phone which
infuriated her.
The above examples are certainly not
celebrities; and there are many more cases we don’t even know of. Some have
even thought it wise to shun the opposite sex for same sex, yet they still have
problems. The problem is that our level of tolerance these days is too low. The
moment we come to terms with the fact that marriage is for two opposites, then,
we will find marriage interesting. Male is the opposite of female and they each
have their unique qualities which must be respected by each. Without this
understanding, we open door for infidelity which is certainly not an option.
Consequently, when a man ceases to be a man, there is always a problem and vice
versa. For any marriage to work, a man must be the man while the woman plays
her unique role as a woman, and both must come to terms with their natural
endowments. There is no other magic.
Back to celebrity issue, Osa
Amadi wrote on Vanguard of December 18, 2017 about celebrity marriages. He said
that artists and most creative geniuses prioritize their work over love and
other things, of which the other partner may find difficult to understand or
come to terms with. He gave instances which I found helpful. He said that Thomas Edison was once so much
occupied with his thoughts that he forgot his name on a ration queue during the
First World War; adding that Bernard Shaw once forgot his destination while in
a bus because he lost his bus ticket on which his destination was written. He said
that such people may not be clinically insane, but surely, they manifest some symptoms
of madness of which their partners, especially female partners, may not
understand. In addition, Amadi stated that Solitude and silence are vital molds
upon which creative ideas take shape and that an artist’s partner who does not
understand this need is bound to come into conflict with the artist, adding
that the remedy is to give the artist the space he or she needs whenever he
wants to be alone.
Osa Amadi may be referring to
celebrities in his exposition. But the knowledge he shared is relevant to
everyone and not only those in the celebrity world. It pays to think and behave
responsibly.
Family institution, which is a
product of marriage is the best and the most exciting institution which is
created by God himself. Others like religion, economy, education, government, etc
are manmade. We therefore ought to protect this sacred institution and stop the
madness of divorce, separation, battle of sexes, and baby mama ideology; which
are but the easiest way of raising bitter and confused children that may never
enjoy a complete home.
Written by Olive Chinyere Amajuoyi
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